Happy birthday, Mr. Salinger!

Reeling from the success of The Catcher in the Rye, Salinger withdrew from public view in the mid-1950s. He published Franny and Zooey in 1961, a collection of novellas (Raise High the Room Beam, Carpenters and Seymour: An Introduction) in 1963 and then bowed out with a New Yorker short story in 1965. Since then he has spoken only fitfully via his lawyers or been snapped in furious, cowering poses on the roads around his home. And woe betide any of those misguided fans who track him down to explain that they, like, totally love him and can so relate to his retreat from a world of phony bastards. "No you don't," he reportedly told one such visitor. "Or you wouldn't be here."

God Bless Judy Blume

The voice-of-authority-during-my-formative-years (and now) on men-

I love men, apart from one: George Bush. I'm hoping that with the next presidential election that we will find ourselves in a better era, where sex is not a dirty subject, where puberty is a healthy subject, where we won't have so much book banning in America. I'm hoping, politically, that America is going to prove to the world that we're not all bad.

<33333

In the new Julia Quinn book, The Lost Duke of Wyndham, one of the characters uses the word "truthiness."

Not historically accurate, yet MADE OF AWESOME.

Fascinating

People were named after things, and things were named after people. His lover in later life, Blanche Blackwell, gave him a small boat named Octopussy, which became the name of a man-eating pet octopus in the short story. In rather ungallant return, Fleming named the ancient guano tanker in Dr No the Blanche.

The crime boss Marc-Ange Draco in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service is named after El Draco, the Spanish name for Sir Francis Drake – a reference picked up years later by J. K. Rowling for her Hogwarts antihero, Draco Malfoy.

Rosa Klebb (the Russian for bread) was partly based on Colonel Rybkin of Soviet intelligence. Major Boothroyd, the secret service armourer, is named in honour of Geoffrey Boothroyd, the gun expert who provided Fleming with invaluable technical advice.

...

Fleming’s villains, like his heroes, are patchworks of different people, names and traits. Le Chiffre, the Benzedrine-sniffing villain of Casino Royale, is believed to be based on Aleister Crowley, who gained notoriety in inter-war Britain as “the Wickedest Man in the World”.

Crowley was a bisexual, sado-masochistic drug addict. A master of Thelemic mysticism (“Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law”), he specialised in mountaineering, interpreting the Ouija board, orgies and thrashing his lovers. The press simultaneously adored and hated him. Crowley made Le Chiffre seem positively sane.

I love them

A confession- I adore bodice-ripper novels, particularly of the Regency genre. LOVE THEM. I blame my misspent youth reading Cosmo at the public library. Warped me proper.

Anyway, one of the best sites out there, in any category, is 'Smart Bitches Who Love Trashy Books. The two bitches, Candy and Sarah, are both extremely gifted writers, and incredibly profane. They are also fucking hilarious. Obviously, I love them. I feel that we could be friends, except they're much smarter than me. But if they need a dumb indie-rock obsessed sidekick, I am so there.

But I digress.

One of the main targets of the Bitches ire is Cassie Edwards, a romance novelist that specializes in romances of the Native American variety. The stereotypes and incredibly stilted dialogue are simply amazing. See SB Sarah's evisceration of Edwards Savage Moon for a classic take-

“It seems that fate today has arranged that you and my adopted daughter should finally meet. Perhaps it is the will of the spirits. I am not one to argue with fate.”
Fate, huh? Chief Stepfather clearly studied his Greek and Roman mythology in Indian chief school.

He knew that this night would not pass without their coming together as lovers!
Chiefs who speak in exclamation points are probably
lousy in bed, though.

Nothing had stopped Chief Bear’s hate until that bullet entered the base of his skull and rendered him almost a vegetable.
Yes. Native Americans totally used that phrase to describe catatonic people.

So when they came upon some fairly blatant plagiarism in Edwards works, they were on it like ducks on junebugs.

With all the exposure this case got, some big media types made some particularly stupid comments about how romance novels are hackneyed, and the plots are all derivative. Well, that went and pissed Candy off, so she made a chart comparing different books, plots and genres to show that many plots, in all genres, tend to repeat.

Some examples-

Title and Author- 'Lord Of Scoundrels' by Loretta Chase
Basic Premise/Plot- Plucky miss shows jaded aristocrat the meaning of love, and proves to him that Not All Women Are Evil
Genre- Romance

Title and Author-Dreaming of You by Lisa Kleypas
Basic Premise/Plot- Plucky miss shows jaded low-born gambler the meaning of love, and proves to him that Not All Women Are Evil
Genre- Romance

Title and Author- The Lord of the Rings trilogy by J.R.R. Tolkien
Basic Premise/Plot- A plucky group of ragtag misfits defeat Evil and thus save the world. The short ones provide occasional comic relief. The world is forever changed.
Genre- Fantasy

Title and Author- Most of the books in the Chronicles of Narnia
by C.S. Lewis
Basic Premise/Plot- A plucky group of ragtag misfits defeat Evil and thus save the world. The short ones provide occasional comic relief. The world is forever changed.
Genre-Fantasy

And my favorites-

Title and Author-As You Like It by William Shakespeare
Basic Premise/Plot- Two couples attempt to sort out love amidst various hijinks.
Cross-dressing ensues.
Genre-He's motherfucking Shakespeare. He doesn't need a motherfucking genre classification.

Title and Author- Twelfth Night by William Shakespeare
Basic Premise/Plot- Two couples attempt to sort out love amidst various hijinks. Cross-dressing ensues.
Genre- He's motherfucking Shakespeare. He doesn't need a motherfucking genre classification.

So to sum up, shit happens. Including plot repetition. Even to motherfucking Shakespeare.

So good

Based upon the stellar review the Smart Bitches gave it, I purchased Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist. Even though it's a teen book. A book for teenagers with one of the hottest love scenes I've ever had the good fortune to read. And the characters are rock snobs. Did I mention the hotness? Because I was fanning myself. Seriously.

And let me echo Smart Bitch Candy here-

but seriously? I’d do Nick, and do him hard.

Amen, Sister Candy. Amen.

LA LA LA

Despite the fact that Christmas, and hopefully, presents, are less than a month away, I just ordered this book.

Oh yes, I'm working my way into a nice little frenzy here....

Oh, the fundies are gonna FREAK

If they had litters of kittens about the characters in the Harry Potter series being wizards- they are going to completely melt down about Dumbledore being teh gay. Because you know, you can catch it. *rolls eyes*

This should be fun!

Harry Potter fans, the rumors are true: Albus Dumbledore, master wizard and Headmaster of Hogwarts, is gay. J.K. Rowling, author of the mega-selling fantasy series that ended last summer, outed the beloved character Friday night while appearing before a full house at Carnegie Hall.

After reading briefly from the final book, "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows," she took questions from audience members. She was asked by one young fan whether Dumbledore finds "true love."

"Dumbledore is gay," the author responded to gasps and applause. She then explained that Dumbledore was smitten with rival Gellert Grindelwald, whom he defeated long ago in a battle between good and bad wizards. "Falling in love can blind us to an extent," Rowling said of Dumbledore's feelings, adding that Dumbledore was "horribly, terribly let down." Dumbledore's love, she observed, was his "great tragedy."

"Oh, my god," Rowling concluded with a laugh, "the fan fiction."

Pop and literature

Using song titles as writing prompts, a new series of short stories is being published this summer. The Fall's book is first, with others to follow. Sounds interesting. I'm thinking that the chapter on 'This Charming Man' will be a bit slashy.

And while Mr Wild originally intended to publish the anthology himself, Serpent's Tail then took on the project. Perverted by Language: Fiction Inspired by The Fall will be launched on 1 July at the inaugural Manchester International Festival with a gig by the band.

A further five volumes along the same lines are already in the works. A clutch of American authors are among those to have contributed to the second book, The Empty Page: Fiction Inspired by Sonic Youth, the American rockers, which will be issued in April next year. Writers including Mike Gayle, Nic Kelman, Mil Millington and Kate Pullinger have contributed to Paint a Vulgar Picture, a volume based on The Smiths, and Pleasant Dreams, inspired by The Ramones, will follow.

There will be a Joy Division anthology entitled Incubation, for which The Damned Utd author David Peace has already agreed to write, and the series will conclude with What Goes On, inspired by the Velvet Underground.

I have no money

Yet I just found 15 bucks to purchase this book. The Stone Roses by Alex Green. All about the Roses first album. SQQQUUUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

A bow in the general direction of Kazza....

I'd be remiss if I didn't mention

the announcement on the Today show that caused me to sit straight up in bed and yell "HOLY FUCK" at the top of my lungs.

"Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows," the last of seven installments of the boy wizard's adventures, will be published July 21, author J.K. Rowling said Thursday.

Rest assured, Snoopy dancing ensued. Once I got out of bed, that is.

I have a confession to make

I dearly love romance novels. My cynical heart adores them, especially those by Lisa Kleypas, Celeste Bradley and Laura Kinsale. But this website, Smart Bitches Who Love Trashy Novels, cracks me up. Seriously, they're on par with the Go Fug girls. Yes, THAT good.

Case in point:

Those Fish are in the Barrel Again

Submissions from The Bitchery, Part I

You find. You email. You attach. You send. We rub our eyes, and take one for the team. The Smart Bitches present a two-part series of reader-submitted cover madness.

Sarah: You’d think there’s only one obvious joke to be made here, but no. Yes, you cut a hole in the box. Then, put the junk in the box.

But then you go buy a different box because clearly that one is way, way too big. And her g-string? Too, too small. I bet it snaps off and flies across the room like an overextended rubber band.