Killers in Blackpool

I adore the Killers for many reasons, mostly because they are massively influenced by New Order, and love Oasis- hello, why would I NOT love them- and because my dear friend, Carrie, literally attended Sunday school with Dave Keuning in the bustling metropolis of Pella, Iowa.

Let me tell you people, there are not that many famous people from Iowa. Okay, so there's John Wayne, Donna Reed, the Everley Brothers, Ashton Kutcher, Elijah Wood and Ron 'Office Space, Band of Brothers, Sex and the City' Livingston.

So when an honest-to-God guitarist with a wildly successful band emerges from the tall corn state, well, we're going to claim him. Kiss off, Las Vegas.

(I know I'm not citing as Iowegians that crap band Slipknot. Though they are from Des Moines Why? Because they suck. Hard).

So reading stuff like this? V.v. cool.

The specifics of these new songs are lost in the sound mix, swirling around the Victorian arches of a venue whose acoustics were not built for rock'n'roll, but the reaction to the familiar favourites - "Somebody Told Me" and "Jenny Was a Friend of Mine" in particular - is such that, if I had hairs on the back of my neck, they'd be bristling like a pestered hedgehog.

The Lay-dees Do America

Oh, hell yes!

Little Britain stars David Walliams and Matt Lucas have revealed plans for a film version of their hit BBC show.

"We've had some sort of interest from America," Walliams told ITV1 chat show host Michael Parkinson.

"We've got a sort of film development deal out there and also we might do something for TV out there," he added.

The comedy duo have signed a deal with Pop Idol producer Simon Fuller to develop a US version of Little Britain for the American cable network HBO.

Crack is whack

After 14 years of marriage to Brown, she could lay claim to almost as many "Houston, We Have A Problem" headlines as she could platinum records. Her last record was released three years ago, and that was a phoned-in Christmas album, notable largely for a please-God-make-it-stop version of "Little Drummer Boy" in which she duetted with her and Brown's daughter, Bobbie Kristina, and accomplished the unimaginable feat of inspiring nostalgia for the David Bowie/Bing Crosby version.

Ms. Jones's knickers

Bridget Jones's famously large pants have gone under the hammer for £2,000, a charity has said.

Personally signed by Hugh Grant, they were auctioned to raise cash for the Royal Parks Foundation (RPF) during a special charity party in London's Hyde Park.

Top 10

1. Smiths- Vicar In a Tutu
2. Sheryl Crow- Abeline
3. Joy Division- Transmission
4. Primal Scream- Kill All Hippies
5. Velvet Underground- Stephanie Says
6. Gnarls Barkley- Smiley Faces
7. Stone Roses- (Song For My)Sugar-Spun Sister
8. Hard-Fi- Cash Machine
9. Beatles- Hard Day's Night
10. Beyonce- Crazy In Love

Electronic

This is so funny to me-

"Bernard was like the Pied Piper, but dressed all in white," laughs Marr. "He'd come back to the studio about 4am with an entourage of our friends, and we'd get a chance to road-test our new songs. One time we had "Idiot Country" blaring out and Bez [of Happy Mondays] was talking to my wife. I noticed he wasn't dancing, so I slowed the tempo down until he started to shuffle again. That's when I knew we'd got it right."

Oh, that Lily

As I really enjoy her album (import, obviously), I'm glad to see Lily Allen trying to break Fortress America. And I'm assuming the song 'Cheryl Tweedy' is not complimentary to the new Mrs. Ashley Cole. Hee.

Friday Top Ten

Ooo, this is a nice one. Wish it was a different Sir Tom song, though.

1. Whiskey In the Jar- Thin Lizzy
2. Temptation- New Order
3. Going Underground- The Jam
4. I Only Want To Be With You- Dusty Springfield
5. Delilah- Tom Jones
6. I'm Every Woman- Chaka Khan
7. Going Nowhere- Oasis
8. Loose Fit- Happy Mondays
9. Walk Away- Kelly Clarkson
10. DARE- Gorillaz

Bonus-
11. Nitty Gritty- Primal Scream

Heh. Heh.

I'd just like to point out that last fall, when the whole 'Cocaine Kate' scandal broke, there was many a nervous nellie media-type person that lamented La Moss's 'career-ending' mistake.

What happens just shy of a year later? Girlfriend's new Agent Provocateur's ad crashes the A.P. website.

Get DOWN with your bad self, Ms. Moss.

Woo!

I must say, bands that I've seen (or am going to see) in concert this year have done quite well for themselves. The Arctics win the Mercury, and Kasabian, whose gig I will be attending in October, currently have the #1 album in the U.K. Obviously, I am the deciding factor. Ha.

Arctic Monkeys capped a year in which they released the fastest selling debut ever, reinvigorated the music industry and lost a founder member, by winning the annual prize which is designed to reward the best release of the year regardless of genre or sales.

The Sheffield four-piece, whose mixture of classic guitar melodies and acutely observed lyrics garnered critical and commercial acclaim, won the prize for Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not.

Oh HELL yes!

Best. Oasis. Song. Ever.

Oasis are set to release a single this year ahead of their forthcoming best of 'Stop The Clocks'.It's understood that a re-recorded 'Acquiesce', which originally appeared as the B-side to 'Some Might Say' in 1995, will be the release.

Top 10

Oooh, cover-licious!

1. Lily Allen- Knock 'Em Out
2. Libertines- Boys In the Band
3. Aretha Franklin- Eleanor Rigby
4. Oasis- Little By Little
5. Kasabian- L.S.F.
6. Sugababes- I Bet You Look Good On the Dancefloor
7. Stone Roses- Simone
8. Otis Redding- Try A Little Tenderness
9. Rolling Stones- She's A Rainbow
10. The Jam- Heatwave

Hypothetically

If you worked part-time, at any job, and kept getting your hours cut, despite needing them, would you try and pull the following (keep in mind, you're working that particular day with the owner's daughter):

1. Leave to get lunch at a local bank's customer appreciation day. The bank? 3-4 blocks away.
2. Come back a half an hour later with take-out lunches from the bank.
3. Eat leisurely.
4. When the OK (owner's kid) says, "Wow, was the line long?" reply, "No, it was only about 5 minutes."

This poses the question, exactly how stupid do they think I am? Also, WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OTHER 25 MINUTES, YOU MORONIC HEIFER????

Would you attempt this? I'm not thinking I'm that brave. And it's a good thing she's so dense, as she's likely unaware that the OK is about to go medieval on her dumb ass.

Just would like to point out

that last night, on the VMA's, during Beyonce's performance, I texted my dear friend,Joy, and said the following:

What. The. Hell. Is. Beyonce. Doing? It's like Inspector Gadget attempting the dance section from Rhythm Nation 1814.

So, imagine my suprise when I read the AP's account of the show, and the reporter said that it was like an awkward Rhythm Nation-type routine.

I AM a genius. Or a pop culture whore. Possibly (probably) both.

Willie

This sounds good-

Nelson recruited Ryan Adams as producer; is this meant to be some sort of Jack White/Loretta Lynn move? After a few listens, we don’t really care. Songbird is too good.

Wow

Should this actually make it into print, I would be very interested in reading this....

NEW Order bassist Peter Hook is sharpening his pencil to write a book about legendary Manchester nightclub The Hacienda. And you might be able to guess the tone of the book from its provisional title - How Not To Run A Club.

Top ten

1. The Jean Genie- David Bowie
2. Ain't No Other Man- Christina Aguilera
3. Love Somebody- Robbie Williams
4. Wake Me Up- Girls Aloud
5. Days Go By- Keith Urban
6. Train- Goldfrapp
7. The Queen Is Dead- The Smiths
8. Lazyitis- Happy Mondays
9. Push the Button- Sugababes
10. Jeepster- T.Rex

Gee, I wonder

if I'm going to try for this. Okay, I SO am.

Oasis’ will soon be putting out a tour documentary Lord Don’t Slow Me Down, which will coincide with the release of their first Greatest Hits compilation Stop The Clocks. Here’s the twist: Guess the correct 18-song track listing and you could find yourself attending the film’s premier in the city of your choice.

Un-BELIEVABLE

I'm guessing this asshat has a 1 in 10 chance of getting his butt handed to him by we nasty career women. Schmuck.

"Don't Marry Career Women" is what the headline of the Aug. 22 Forbes.com story read. Just like that. "Don't Marry Career Women." It was easy to blink, shake your head like you were seeing things. Surely it was a joke, something out of the Onion. A provocative headline on a more nuanced story. But then came the text, by Michael Noer, an executive editor and writer for Forbes.com.

Chavs on a bus

The following post from NME's V Festival blog made me spit pop out my nose. Okay, wine, but it's still freaking funny.

Get Sammy L Jackson on the blower, we've come up with a hit! It's the surefire zillion-dollar sequel to Snakes On A Plane - Chavs On A Bus! An edge-of-your-seat shock thriller telling the story of an intrepid rock journalist who innocently boards a shuttle bus from Chelmsford station to the V festival site only to look around him and... CHAVS! Fucking shitloads of them! And there's no escape! "Awright mate, wanna laaaager? Who's this Kasabrian then, they a bit like Keane or what? Waaaaaagh wankaaaaaahhh!" Does our hero survive to watch Art Brut skipping with microphone leads and giving the crowd lengthy motivational therapy speeches? Um, yes, he does.