Wednesday, May 03, 2006


No more Footballers Wives! AARRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHH! No more thinly-disguised versions of Coleen McLoughlin (Wayne Rooney, Man U) and Posh Beckham? Repeat, argh!

They can't take my Tanya Turner away! I mean, look at her, standing between her fat football-managing husband, Frank, whom she eventually kills with a combo of Viagra and cocaine and her swings-both-ways lovah, Conrad! And even wearing the same dress as Conrad's former Bollywood star wife, Amber, and the fact that she once slept with Hazel, the chick in the red hat, does not appear to bother her in the slightest.

What will I do for my bleached-blonde, coke-addicted, manipulative wench fix?

I have not adored a TV character like this since Sydney Bristow on Alias, who thanks to freaking ABC, is ALSO being cruelly wrenched from me. And don't even get me started on Mr. Sark, the ever-so-delightfully evil British! accented spy on Alias.... Sob. No more possibility for Sarkney action? I am bereft.

Damn you, Footballers Wives, damn you!!!!! Also, damn you, ABC, damn you, too!

*Piccie from

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