And the circle is complete

Zak Starkey to possibly join Oasis on a permanent basis.

This last line is why I am truly in unrequited love with Noel Gallagher:

"If he came to me tomorrow and said, 'I want to leave The Who and join you lot permanently,' I'd say, 'Brilliant. Get me your dad's autograph and you're in.'"

Joe Conason rules

And this little prick is well, a bit of a prick, isn't he? Entitled Mofo.

Almost without fail, when reading crap like this, I have "Town Called Malice" by the Jam running through my head. Actually, "Eton Rifles" would be way more appro, but there you are.

No improvement necessary.

It is nearly improbable, nay impossible, for this commentary to be improved upon. No additional gilding of the lily, shining of the silver or burnishing of the brass possible. All right, I made those last two up.

Ignore my mauling of the English language, just go look. Funny!

My NCAA brackets were just shot to hell

And I don't care....

Snakes in planes? With Samuel L. Jackson? And added cursing? I'm So Going, it's not even funny. And I don't even like snakes!

As film backstories go, this one is fairly serpentine. This month, New Line Cinema's "Snakes on a Plane," which wrapped principal photography in September in Vancouver, went back before the cameras for five days of additional shooting at the Lot in Los Angeles.

In this case, it wasn't the usual reshoot, hastily assembled to fix a nagging story problem. Instead, the studio decided to create new scenes that would take the movie from PG-13 into R-rated territory.

The article continues...

The audio bit uses a Jackson sound-alike shouting, "I want these motherfucking snakes off the motherfucking plane!" Soon, the growing legion of fans added their voices as they demanded that that phrase also appear in the movie.

That popping noise you just heard?

Would be rock snob heads exploding. The Small Faces album, 'Ogden's Nut Gone Flake,' is being re-issued. Though true rock snobs probably already own it. On mint-condition vinyl.

Candy Girl

My favorite member of New Edition? Have to go with Ralph Tresvant, man. I am so going through my CD's tonight! Yes, I was a nerd in junior high. Okay, and now.

Random (Squirrel!)

So, my dad calls the store today, asking if we had any doll bottles at home. I thought he said "dog bottoms," but that's neither here nor there.

Seems that when he was trimming a tree today, he accidentally knocked a squirrels nest out of said tree. Needless to say, since my pops has watched "Dr. Doolittle" roughly as many times as I have watched "24 Hour Party People," we now have 4 baby squirrels living in a box in our living room

Names were the next issue. I suggested Ian, John, Mani and Reni, but Ma wasn't going for that. It goes without saying that any names associated with the Happy Mondays were immediately dismissed. Morrissey, Marr, Andy and Mike were shot down, too.

The compromise names are John, Paul, George and Ringo. Obviously, Paul is the runt.

Macca PISSED me off with the whole switching Lennon-McCartney to McCartney-Lennon songwriting credit thing. And the fact that his wife, do-gooder that she might be, didn't have his daughter, Stella Freaking McCartney design her wedding dress. Which was a Chantilly travesty, btw.... I wish Yoko would buy back the Beatles back catalog from the nightmare that is Michael Jackson, and hand Paul's ass to him on a platter. Harumph.

Which brings me to my main point. I called one of my brothers to share the story, and he happened to be at dinner with my bloomin' sister and her eunuch of a husband. (I think that's correct usage of that word; it means neutered, right)?

Usually, the conversation would have lasted a really long time, consisting of various statements such as, "Remember when he almost set his pants on fire and had to call the fire department from the pond?"

FYI- Dad just retired from the fire department after 30 years, 15 of which he served as assistant chief. In my experience, firemen are the worst at letting things get out of hand, flame-wise. Or maybe it's just him. Apple not far from the tree and all that.

The fact remains that somewhere in the conversation, the following sentence would have been uttered: "It's just like the time he brought Goose Goose home."

Anyway, Goose Goose was the injured Canadian Goose that Dad found alongside Highway 61, brought home to live in our garage, and nursed back to health. Damn goose lived in the garage for an entire winter, shat on Mom's windshield frequently, and now lives on our pond during non-migratory season.

Back to the story. As my brother was with my bloomin' sister, the convo was cut way, way short. As I hung up the phone, I thought to myself, "Oooo, he's at dinner with the Princess. Mustn't disturb the Princess!"

Which is so much funnier when you use the voices that I used to say aforementioned snark. Those would be the voices that David Walliams and Matt Lucas use on "Little Britain" when they are portraying possibly the worst cross-dressers in the world, Emily and Florence.

"But we're LAY-DEES!"

Picture from BBC America

Barabbas with Maracas

Oh DEAR GOD, Bez is Barabbas? I want to see this soooo f-ing bad.

This is Bez, y'all. Second seemingly (probably) high person from the right. God, I love the Mondays. Not Mondays. THE Mondays.

Arctics

Imagine if the Strokes were British, and had spent their formative years listening to the Jam.

That would about sum it up.

Honestly, the Arctic Monkeys concert that I attended on Saturday night in Chi-town, was one of the best I've ever been to.

And I'm not just saying that because I was 25 feet from the stage. Or because the Metro is about a block away from the Friendly Confines of Wrigley Field. Or because Alex was channeling Morrissey, walking out on stage with carnations in his back pocket. Utterly fantastic. Or because Casey Jo and I would not turn down an opportunity to, ahem, get to know Jamie, the guitarist. We know we're total pervs, as the boy is 19. But what a cutie!

Also, they have the proper respect for Paul and Noel. Good boys:)

Strange Town

After getting my hot little hands on a copy of the Jam's box set last Thursday, I have listened to the song, Strange Town, roughly 50 times. Kicks ass.

Make that 51.

Piccie from www.nostalgiacentral.com/music/jam.htm