Saturday, December 22, 2007

at Roppongi

at Roppongi, originally uploaded by Hiroki Blue.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Bah freaking humbug

The holidays? Bring out the stupid in people. As I'm so, so, so very tired from making millions of centerpieces and delivering them all over bumfuck Egypt today, here's a sequence of events.

-Woman comes into store last week and orders a very complicated centerpiece to be picked up this AM. You don't get complicated for 30 bucks, which is what she wanted it for.

Centerpieces are very time consuming, so the labor eats up a lot of value that could be applied to the flowers. You pay 50 bucks, now then you can be picky.

-Woman is slightly snooty. 30 bucks and snooty. Get down with your bad self.

-This AM, woman walks in and wants her centerpiece. Which isn't done. Or even started. (it's been slightly wild this week).

-Mom tells her we will deliver her masterpiece for free to a neighboring town.

-Woman is mollified, tells Mom that someone will be home all day.

-Fast forward a few hours. I'm driving around, trying to find the fucking house for delivery in London-esque fog.

-Okay, and listening to Babyshambles and Wee The View Lads at top volume.

-Alright, and texting Kaz. But for serious, I was actually paying attention to where I was going.

- I find the house. Knock on the door, carrying the most beautiful 30-dollar centerpiece EVER CREATED.

-No one is fucking home.

-Try to keep extremely friendly Lab from knocking me to the ice-covered ground.

-Really wish I didn't have on slippery, but cute shoes.

-Pound on the door. Can hear TV inside.

-Ring doorbell again. It's really fucking cold, and I have another 3 places to get to, and it's starting to get really farcking foggy.

-Check door. Is open. Leave centerpiece (in a protective pink bag- keeps flowers from dying) on stairs.

-Leave house.

-Get back to shop an hour later.

-Snooty woman calls and gives me the 5th (or whatever is the worst) degree about why her centerpiece hasn't been delivered. I'm like, "Au contraire. I did deliver it." She then asks me all sorts of details about the house I delivered it to, and I'm thinking, "Bitch, please! Do you know how many deliveries I did this afternoon?" (I turn into Snoop when confronted with stupid people)

-She asks her father if he's seen anything in a pink bag. He had. AND HE THREW IT AWAY. Now, you have to be a particular kind of idiot to throw something like that away. It was obviously, obviously flowers. The card was on the outside. It smelled good.

-Woman wanted us to deliver another one tonight. For free. Got snooty with Mom when she said that wasn't our responsibility. Mom refused to budge. Hanging up may have occurred.

-May I point out that on the way home an hour later, I drove 35 MPH because the fog was so bad. So I was supposed to risk my life for thirty fucking bucks because her father is a blooming moron. Yeah, that's about right.

I hate people sometimes. Merry Effing Christmas.

Random ten

1. Winterlong- Neil Young
2. The Only One I Know- Mark Ronson feat. Robbie Williams
3. Enchantment- Corinne Bailey Rae
4. On Your Own- Blur
5. Can't Get You Out Of My Head- Kylie Minogue
6. Boogie On Reggae Woman- Stevie Wonder
7. Sound And Vision- Franz Ferdinand feat. Girls Aloud
8. There Is A Light That Never Goes Out- The Smiths
9. Moving To New York- The Wombats
10. Ooh- Scissor Sisters

11. Whatever Happened To?- Buzzcocks
12. From The Floorboards Up- Paul Weller

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Wow. WOW.

Sweet Jesus, I'm not sure which is the bigger moron.

A- The dude that got "Hot Rod" tattooed on his penis ON A BET


B- THE Chief Resident of General Surgery AT MAYO CLINIC that took a picture of it while inserting a catheter

PHOENIX -- A surgeon faces a disciplinary hearing for snapping a photo of a patient's tattooed genitals during an operation and showing the photo around to other doctors.

Mayo Clinic Hospital administrators said Dr. Adam Hansen, chief resident of general surgery, admitted taking the photo with his cell phone on Dec. 11. The tattoo on strip club owner Sean Dubowik's penis reads: "Hot Rod." (my emphasis)

Dubowik, who had undergone a gallbladder operation, said he learned of the photo Monday when the Mayo Clinic called.

This part slayed me.

Dubowik said he got the tattoo on a bet and that "it was the most horrible thing I ever went through in my life."

You don't say. Who would ever think that getting a tattoo ON YOUR PENIS would hurt? I would have NEVER guessed that.

Knees Up

Chas & Dave were never, and are not, cool. They haven't been given the critical rehabilitation of, say, Ian Dury or Madness. And yet, in the age of The X Factor and punk foursomes who weren't even born in 1977, Chas & Dave sell out live dates across the UK. Pete Doherty, a long-time admirer, says he was inspired to pick up a guitar thanks to their music – and Doherty supported them at a rowdy Saturday night gig in Chatham, Kent, waving a flag as he accompanied Chas on vocals for "Ain't No Pleasing You", an insanely catchy ballad of wounded male pride, which reached No 2 in 1982.

This year, they had three slots at Glastonbury, their second appearance at the event. Their Christmas Beano has become a festive tradition, not only for Libertines fans but also for self-proclaimed "geezers" who identify with the band's working-class values and find authenticity in their trad music and un-Americanised accents.

And awwww, it's Fanboy Pete! I love
Fanboy Pete! Almost as much as I love Pete's tendency to take his cat everywhere with him. And he actually sounds REALLY good here.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Please feed a girlband member

Sarah. EAT A SANDWICH. Look how cute Kim looks. And Nicola. And Nadine. And for God's Sake, Cheryl.

Darling, eat. I'd hate to nominate you for
"Sternum Watch."

From the 'St. Trinian's' premiere.....

A little creepy, totally cute

'Janie Jones'- Babyshambles and friends

Amy, Amy, Amy

In one of her comedy specials, Kathy Griffin did a routine at a women's prison. She asked the inmates that were in the clink because of a man to raise their hands. Nearly all the women did.

Amy Winehouse was arrested in London today (December 18).The singer is currently being held at Shoreditch Police Station in Hackney in connection with the bribery plot for which her husband is currently in prison. Blake Fielder-Civil has been in prison since last month after being arrested for trying to pay James King to withdraw a statement he made to police. King is a victim in an alleged assault case against Fielder-Civil. Police in London confirmed that a 24 year-old woman was arrested by appointment and that the arrest was “in connection with an investigation into perverting the course of justice”.

And Mitch? Maybe if you spent more time with your daughter, and less time talking to the tabloids, your girl wouldn't be in so much fucking trouble.... Just a thought.

Monday, December 17, 2007

Oh HELL YES (part 2)

Girl Power was back with a bang in the UK this weekend as Posh, Sporty, Baby, Scary and Ginger spiced up the lives of fans in London - and performed together in the UK for the first time in almost a decade.

A star-studded audience, including celeb chef Gordon Ramsay, Peaches Geldof, singer Will Young and Roberto Cavalli - who designed the girls' costumes for the tour - saw Geri Halliwell wow the 20,000-strong crowd in a replica of the iconic Union flag dress she donned for the 1997 Brit Awards.

And Emma Bunton, who suffered a sprained ankle during the fivesome's Las Vegas gig and has been receiving treatment from David Beckham's doctor, soldiered on wearing an ankle support for the show - though she had to pull out of some of the more demanding dance routines.

The London gig has been dubbed the girls' raunchiest to date. However, earlier on in the week it was strictly a family affair for the Beckham family, as Victoria was joined by her footie-ace husband and three sons Brooklyn, Romeo and Cruz for a festive spin on the ice-rink at Hyde Park.

Oh HELL yes!

Manic Street Preachers are set to receive the Godlike Genius award at the 2008 Shockwaves NME Awards, we can reveal.

The Welsh band are set to be honoured for an outstanding, unique and innovative career in music.