Sunday, April 01, 2007

Best. Thing. Ever.

As previously mentioned, my family is in the process of cleaning out my grandparents home, and dividing up stuff. In the process of doing so, my mom found a book that she thought I'd enjoy.

The book? Published in 1951. The title?

"How To Give Sex Instructions: A Guide For Parents, Teachers and Others Responsible For the Training Of Young People."

Yes, a vintage sex book, and more specifically, a Pre-Vatican II Catholic sex book.

'Twisted' does not begin to describe this pamphlet. The author was apparently incapable of completing a sentence, and was really fond of one fragment in particular. "Mortal Sin."

In the section for boys, the author uses lots of airplane-related metaphors and has a section on 'self-abuse,' that contains the following sentence.

"Seed has life-germs and hence is sacred."

I'm telling you, this is the best present I've ever received, and I'm including when I was 7 and got a Barbie Dream House. I've been completely unable to stop myself from laughing.

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